I did an experiment.
A few months ago, I was struggling to turn my work brain off before going to pick up my daughter from daycare.
I would leave the house and panic that I didn’t send an email to a new client.
I wasn’t paying attention to my hubby when he was talking to me at dinner.
I was constantly going through the list of all the things that needed to be done tomorrow that I didn’t finish today.
Or maybe for you it is a little different.
Does this sound familiar, friend?
You see a ping from your manager at 9 pm and you rush to answer it.
You don’t feel like you did anything today.
You’re wishing you had done more deep work during that time you “blocked,” but instead it got eaten up by meetings or your social media (again!).
You wish you had crossed more things off your to-do list.
And quite dreadfully, every time your slack pings, you think someone is mad at you.
When I was feeling like that, I hated arriving at daycare feeling so distracted.
I knew something had to change when I was completely distracted by my work podcasts and to-do lists at the playground.
So I did an experiment (btw, I do a lot of experiments!).
I thought about what I tell my clients: how we need to lean on our tools when things start to get overwhelming or continue being stressful.
And what always works for me is writing shit down.
Because I can then look at it and decide whether it’s worth stressing over (spoiler: it’s not).
And the truth is, having these stressful and anxious reactions to work is a response to trauma.
It's your mind's way of keeping you safe from getting kicked out of the pack (this “pack” being your workplace and not the prehistoric cave).
To retrain, and calm, my brain I started doing the following for a week, and then a month.
Get a cute notebook (very important).
List every single thing I accomplished that day both personal and professional. (Yes, making yourself and/or your kid breakfast is a win in my book!)
Write down on a post-it EVERYTHING you *think* you need to do tomorrow (keyword: everything) and place it on the next page of the journal.
Dance to a favorite song.
Arrive at the next part of your day refreshed and present.
This exercise has really decreased my end of work anxiety to almost non-existent.
Now before heading to daycare pickup I have a feeling of lightness from knowing I actually accomplished something throughout the day.
And also have cleared my brain of everything I need to take care of tomorrow; I can later prioritize if I actually need to do any of those things.
As a result, I can be in the next phase of my day— family time, fully present.
If you try it, will you let me know how it goes?
Love,
—Nic
PS. I'm excited to be able to offer an Open House next week (inspired by my group coaching participants!).
This is a free group call for you to show up and get coaching and feedback about your job search, career strategy, and mindset.
Participation is voluntary. If you just want to listen and learn that's totally welcome. Registration is required, book your spot by clicking here.
