How I’m creating holiday traditions with my toddler
My parents both have eight siblings.
I have over twenty cousins and most of them grew up in the same zip code as me.
Needless to say, my childhood gatherings were always a party.
We’d leave the house around 2 o’clock with plans to eat around 5 or 6pm.
My dad always supplied the mashed potatoes.
My dad made the best mashed potatoes in the whole entire world.
He filled it with milk and butter and we used a hand mixer to beat them together so there were barely any chunks.
My sister and I would stick our fingers in it all the way to the party to get a taste. It was so smooth.
Around 5pm we’d all file into the kitchen and eat from the buffet laid out on my grandma’s counter.
I would take a big whopping scoop of mashed potatoes, pile it with gravy and a big scoop of corn on top. Nothing else mattered except mashed potatoes to me.
(My aunt told me last week when she was visiting that she missed my grandma’s stuffing the most because she added orange zest to it. I appreciated that memory.)
After dinner, we’d be tucked away in my Grandma Pearl’s basement (I can still smell the potpourri she must have had all over the house in small dishes.)
There was family everywhere talking loudly and retelling all the stories.
Then around 9pm there would be a knock at the door. (gasp! At this hour!)
Guess who!? It was Santa!
(I’m not sure when this tradition began but I absolutely loved it. A friend or neighbor of the family would dress up as Santa and pass out gifts!)
He’d walk joyfully down the stairs. We’d all sit on Santa’s lap and take photos individually while taking our gift which was meticulously wrapped by my mom or one of her sisters who had planned for this event. There was always a gift for everyone. Nobody ever felt left out.
I started thinking about this over the weekend when I was playing Christmas music that transported me to my grandma’s basement.
(Specifically “The Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams that my cousins and I made a dance routine for. Yes, I broke into the dance. Yes, you can ask my husband about it.)
And then to my childhood home where Christmas music blasted every Saturday and Sunday morning between Thanksgiving and Christmas while my mom cleaned the house.
And to my Aunt’s basement where I wrapped presents for my cousins (from Santa) because she hated doing it and I loved doing it (I'm a fcking master present wrapper so if you ever need help let me know).
And to college with my best friend Adam’s parent’s kitchen where we would make a million different cookies with his mom, aunt, brother and sister-in-law.
I haven't been home for Christmas in years and I haven't been home for Christmas regularly since before I spent Christmas in Peru in 2008.
This weekend, as Mariah Carey sang in my ear, I couldn’t help but wonder…
What kind of traditions were we making for our daughter?
And what would she remember?
I guess when I think about it, it means more to me that she feels included in our tradition creation.
For example, merging her likes with mine like painting on the kitchen table (her fave) while we jam out to holiday music (my fave).
I can't wait until she's older and she can tell me what she loves doing.
And until then, we’ll sprinkle in shared activities that spark joy for me because when I look back, what mattered the most was who I was with not necessarily what I was doing.
What traditions have you had in the past that you're taking forward into the future?
And what are you creating now that are different?
Reply and let me know. I'm so curious about this right now.
With love and the silkiest mashed potatoes,
Nic
